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Home » The Famous Blog » What Social Media Etiquette Is… and Isn’t

What Social Media Etiquette Is… and Isn’t

August 14, 2011 - Last Modified: August 16, 2011 by Adam Gottlieb 1,417

Social Media Etiquette

As more and more businesses and self-employed professionals head online, heeding the call for all things social media-related, there seems to be some confusion regarding what is considered both acceptable and commendable behavior in social media circles, versus what is looked at as unnecessary, annoying, or just plain offensive.

Many writers and bloggers have made attempts to offer some tips on social media etiquette, and a lot of the popular advice is pure common sense that should be followed. But the truth is that etiquette online goes beyond saying “please” and “thank you” and refraining from flooding people with unwanted, spammy messages or material

What many still fail to recognize is that one’s behavior online presents an image (one that often does not involve face-to-face contact and all the social cues that come along with it), and in the space of the Internet, impressions are made very quickly, yet are hard to break. Moreover, people who are online often have already become accustomed to mentally tune out any unwanted solicitations and to discredit those who are obviously trying to be something they are not.

That said, here are a few areas where the lines of social media and online etiquette seem a bit blurred:

Commenting… Are You Human?

Sometimes, the only thing genuine and human about some comments is that the author correctly filled in the captcha phrase. If you are going to make the effort to write a comment, then make it relevant in some way to the post or article. We’re not talking paragraphs of Pulitzer Prize winning writing, just a few relevant lines will do. It’s not so nice for the writer to receive a comment that clearly shows the commenter didn’t bother reading the article.

And, yes, I know people are motivated to leave these robo comments because they want a link back to their site or they want to advertise their product or service. But the comments section of a post or article is not solely a platform to hawk your wares.

If you want to reference your site then at least make an attempt to read the article, write a few relevant lines, and then gently work in a commercial or self-promotional reference. For example:

Some good points here… but business owners considering outsourcing should also make sure that the they have a very clear job description, realistic expectations, and some way to evaluate the success (or failure) of the setup. For those who would like more information on how to get the most out of outsourcing, I wrote a post about it on my blog.

Even if you are trying to generate a link, many website developers and SEO experts rightly point out that these links (even on do-follow sites) likely provide very little if any link juice and probably aren’t so valuable if they are removed from a good comment.

Online Self Expression Versus Insensitivity

Every website and social space has it’s own set of rules (whether they are clearly stated or are unspoken) of what is considered acceptable language and expression. Business owners and self-employed professionals should make it a point to adhere to the level of formality, acceptable language, and any other sensitivities when visiting another’s site. This even goes for social networking and social bookmarking platforms as well as forums and the like.

But… the rules change on one’s own site. Some people may use language or make references to things that others may find offensive, yet often it is just an extension of who they are socially, culturally, and as individuals. Just because there are readers out there who may be offended by your style does not necessarily mean that you have to censor your content or language; every business owner or professional needs to make that personal judgment call. As long as the site’s owners and contributors are avoiding criminal activities, then those who find the material offensive shouldn’t go there or partake of the site’s services.

You Can Be Selective and Still Be Accessible

Realize that you do not have to respond to every comment made on your article or post, nor to every message or email you receive. Is it a nice thing to do? Yes. Are there some supermen and women out there who seem to somehow find the time to do it, and do it properly? Yes. But it is not for everyone.

Just because a comment or message goes unanswered does not mean that you are appearing to be inaccessible or that you will be offending someone. In fact, setting healthy boundaries and limits and focusing on quality responses and engagements over quantity may actually increase your reputation online and the overall impression people have about the value of your goods or services. Why? Because you are telling people that you recognize the value of your time, energy, knowledge, and skills. Moreover, it gives the impression that you are busy, and the implication is that your time and services are in demand. This subtle, implicit message, even if it isn’t true, can actually help to increase the number of people wanting to do business with you.

In short, Internet etiquette is a delicate balance- one that requires you to consider other people but also leave enough room to be yourself.

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Filed Under: Online Business, Social Media

About Adam Gottlieb

Follow @frugalentrepren

Adam Gottlieb is a small business owner, freelance writer, and small business consultant with over ten years experience helping small and home-based businesses improve their image, increase sales and better manage their resources (both the animate and inanimate ones). He is currently the owner and senior editor of the The Frugal Entrepreneur Small Business Blog providing frugal business tips, tools, and resources to small and home-based business owners.

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{ 14 Responses }

  1. jigar doshi says:
    very true. let people connect to you. easily. the other day. i was reading a blog and i was appalled to see that there was no way to reach the author or to even comment on the particular post. why would the author want to do that ? i simply avoided his posts later on. nice post :)
  2. Emma says:
    I'm glad that there's a post out there detailing the specifics of commenting etiquette. Usually, the focus on social media manners is more centered around posts via various social widgets, but it's the comments on a blog that really drive the conversation on any given subject matter. Respect to the comments!
  3. Anita Campbell says:
    This biggest issue I see is people who don't leave a human name, but instead want to leave keywords in the name field. To be human please start by leaving a human being's name - how can you come across as a human if you don't even give your name?
    • Hesham says:
      Hi Anita, I completly agree with you, I am suffering of this issue because I see value in comments while people are not using their names, they instead use their company name or domain name, and I have to delete their comments or spend time editing them! I hope everyone will just use their names.
  4. knikkolette says:
    Great post - I liked the subject of commenting on people's content. My blog is fairly new, but looking back, I can see what you're talking about. There were a few "nice post" comments. Really? That's it? I'm with you... if you're going to bother to comment, say something relating to what was written.
  5. Siddharth Goyal says:
    Good point about irrelevant comments. It sometimes get very irritating for me when I receive a notification in my mailbox telling me a post has received a comment only to find some generic crap written which is obvious attempt to promote something. I think such "spammers" are probably playing the numbers game. Let's face it, not all blog admins are smart or care to read these comments. If 1 out of 10 blog owners publishes their "sophisticated spam" their purpose is served!
    • Adam Gottlieb says:
      "...If 1 out of 10 blog owners publishes their “sophisticated spam” their purpose is served!" That's *if* these backlinks are actually worth much. Most of these kinds of comments say nothing and the authors are obviously just after the link. But, these kinds of links probably aren't helping their PR much, and in the case where the actual comment is a sales push... unless it's extremely well-written, most of us have just trained ourselves to tune them out. Adam
  6. Ryan Biddulph says:
    Hi Adam, I like your take. Social media etiquette toes a fine line. Express yourself, but do it with tact. I intend to make a positive impact wherever I show up: Facebook, Twitter, wherever. I intend to be mindful of others, leave value packed comments and be as accessible as possible. I respond when I can, doing what I can, and leave it at that. It's really quite simple. Keep the Golden Rule in mind, and apply to social media. Thanks for sharing. RB
    • Adam Gottlieb says:
      Hi Ryan, That's a good attitude- especially since that "fine line" is on record and can be spread to hundreds and even thousands of people in an instant. To a certain extent, with social media a person has to be even more careful than they would if they were standing in front of someone. Thanks for the comment, Adam
  7. Jill says:
    On the 2nd point, whatever your style of writing and expressing yourself are, somebody would get offended in one way or another. How you communicate could become the basis of people's perception of who you are and as long as you stay true to yourself and make sure you get your message across as intelligently as possible, I think you've already done your part.
    • Adam Gottlieb says:
      Jill, "On the 2nd point, whatever your style of writing and expressing yourself are, somebody would get offended in one way or another..." True, but I'll offer a comment that I received on this post on another site: "As a moderator here on BizSugar, what surprises me are some 1st-time authors who start with a controversial or possibly offensive article. Since the audience doesn't really know where they're coming from yet, why not introduce themself in such a way that they get to know their core values 1st, then if they throw in a little controversy (or salty language), the readers will have a way to gage it" He's right, and that's why in many cases a person should think a little bit first before writing or submiting a comment. Adam
  8. Anna says:
    "Commenting… Are You Human?" lol! Ilove it, you totally right! if you right a comment you should make some effort, this is part of th deal, and it's fun too :)
  9. Edgar says:
    I think the reason behind the web looking almost the same is because people in it are all trying to become that shiny character that they aren't. I always detect them as soon as i hit the 2nd line of their posts. I believe that people who stood up from the crowd in this business are the ones who had been honest and unique. Trying to be someone you aren't will definitely ruin your business, because web surfers these days can distinguish between a real from a non real person.
    • Adam Gottlieb says:
      Edgar, You're right, people should try to be themselves online. It's often easy to spot a faker, just as it is offline. But, unfortunately not in every case. I think a lot of people still make assumptions about a person and his or her site based on the way the site looks, what the PR is, and how active they seem to be in their social networks- *even* in cases where the information they are presenting is inaccurate. Moreover, some people can purposely try to be insensative or crude online in order to come across as "different" and "genuine." They may pay a high price though. Adam

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